He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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