...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Randomize
