I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Randomize
