I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
My breasts were aching with rage.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Randomize
