I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
