happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Randomize
