Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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