everyone is single if you try hard enough
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
