im gay
i know
yea but for you.
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
