you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
