I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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