This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
