I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Randomize
