After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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