ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
Randomize
