why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
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