I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
