"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
