i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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