We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
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