CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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