I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize
