Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Randomize
