thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Randomize
