How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
As shirtless as possible
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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