There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
Randomize