I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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