she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Randomize
