you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Randomize
