I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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