god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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