This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
I believe in your delicious
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Randomize
