its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I'm at about main and main street
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Randomize
