I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
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