I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Randomize
