Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Randomize
