Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize
