He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
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