Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize