i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Randomize
