you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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