She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
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