I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
