its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
