im about as happy as oj after his trial
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize