butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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