i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
