gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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