clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
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