Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Randomize
