So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Randomize
